The astute amongst you may have noticed that I missed last Wednesday’s blog, making record time for utterly failing to participate. But I have a good excuse: I smashed the holy living crap out of my fingers, and really just wasn’t thinking about blogging. Or writing at all. It’s been a week now (my hand looks much less dramatic, but I’m still typing very, very slowly), and in that time I’ve written about 400 words. That kind of blows the giant word count goal I’d discussed for February when I last posted.
And this is one of the things that you pretty much have to deal with as a writer. Things go wrong. Things totally outside your control go wrong. It’s terribly frustrating, and most of the time all you can really do is wait to get over the trauma, whether it’s physical like this is or emotional (I lost a month of writing when our dog died) and then try like the devil to make up for lost time.
I think one of the smartest things you can do when you’ve hit a Trauma Wall is to be kind to yourself. A friend of mine’s mother died recently, and some days he’s been able to write, and others the world’s been too overwhelming. He’s accustomed to writing quickly, and right now, even on the good days, he isn’t writing as fast as he’s used to. But as a little more time passes, he’s finding his feet again, and very often that’s what needs to be done. Pushing and pushing and pushing isn’t always the best response, and that is *not* easy for me to accept or comprehend.
So I’ve spent the better part of the last week trying not to overdo it. It’s my nature to overdo things (which I might talk about next week), but this sprain is not going to be made better by trying to type too much. If I actually *let it heal* I will be able to make up for lost time, but if I push it too far right now I’m only going to extend the period of time in which I am damaged, which does me no good at *all*. Intellectually, I know this. Emotionally? BAH! I should be able to have both hands broken and a lobotomy and be able to do my job! Bah! Hah! I am mighty! Fear me! AHAHAHAHAHAH ow stupid fingers wah okay i was wrong i will be good*
I really hope I’ll be back next week with no physical trauma and the better part of another 20K under my belt by the time I get to my Wednesday post, but if not, I hope I’m not dumb enough to hurt myself again in the trying.
*This was dramatic only, I did not really hurt myself : )