We’re are supposed to write every day. Yes. I know. And I do. Really. (laughing into my elbow)
But let’s face it, there are days when even finding time to turn on the PC/Mac/laptop is just impossible. So, here are my top ten reasons *not* to write on the holidays. They are not funny, but they are real—well, most of them—and they are more personal than I ever get on MW. Why not? It’s the HOLIDAYS!
Put your top ten reasons not to write on the holidays (Christmas/solstice/Hanukkah/Kwanza/combo of them/whatever) into a comment and I’ll draw a winner out of a hat. The winner to receive a piece of jewelry that I make of my choosing and a signed copy of Blood Cross.
10. I have to walk the dogs. (They are newly adopted and we are on a strict regimen of feedings, medication, and walking. This is far more important than word count.)
9. I have to cook for one of my family events. I have a distended family (as opposed to an extended family. Make up your own reasons why based on social commentary of the sad state of marriage in modern times, the funnier and sadder the better) and each member has his/her own event, plus the hubby’s family. And his is weirder than mine.
8. I have to take my dad shopping. (He’s legally blind and this takes all day. And OMG that man can shop. He has memorized every store in South Park Mall. And he can give driving directions to all the others, despite not being able to see. And he wants prices read aloud—loudly because he’s deaf too—and comparisons of every brand’s offerings. And he’s all-color colorblind and I have to describe jammies to him even though he’s never seen the color red or green… It’s fun but exhausting. I don’t write that day. I come home and kick off the shoes and fix a stiff drink.)
7. Making jewelry for Christmas gifts. This year I am waaaay behind because of a family member’s emergency visit to and stay at hospital. He lived, but I still tear up just thinking about it, and my left pupil blows which is what happens when I get totally, completely stressed. It looks really odd and it’s kinda hard to see up close. So I open a beer and relax instead.
6. Mom’s Family and Friends Christmas Party, is an *all out* event starting at 6 p.m. She cooks for it for a whole week. It usually lasts until 9 p.m. because her friends are getting old. I help out clean up afterward, which takes longer than the party lasts. Another night I come home and crash.
5. Complete loss of short term memory. I was supposed to write today? Hmmm. Maybe it’s the result of the stiff drinks…
4. Shock from seeing the number on the scales. I did NOT eat that much!
3. My own Christmas shopping. Oy… (closes eyes to hide from the balance on the debit card.)
2. I have to dress up and play Santa Claus. (Not really, but I’m running out of excuses)
And the number one reason I didn’t write today?
1. I have to digest the last meal.